Showing posts with label giving. Show all posts
Showing posts with label giving. Show all posts

Sunday, August 30, 2009

The giver is greater than the gift.


Commentary by Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

Besides having one's (own) wish granted, the joy of giving another (person) happiness, that itself is greater than a wish granted, if one has risen to that plane of human evolution when one can enjoy pleasure with the pleasure of another, when one can feel satisfaction in the satisfaction of another, when one can be happy in bringing happiness to another.

No one will give another happiness and will not have the same come to him a thousandfold.

There comes a stage of evolution in the life of man when he feels more satisfied by seeing another person satisfied with food than by his having eaten it himself, when he feels comfortable in seeing another person comfortable, when he feels richly adorned by seeing another person clothed nicely; for this stage is a stepping-stone to the realization of God.

Human beings living in their shells are mostly unaware of the privilege of life and so are unthankful to the Giver of it.

In order to see the grace of God man must open his eyes and raise his head from his little world.

Then he will see -- above and below, to the right and the left, before and behind -- the grace of God reaching him from everywhere in abundance.

A person who is loved by everybody in the world, and yet if he has not loved anybody, he has done nothing.

A person who has possessed the wealth of the whole world, but if he has given nothing, he has not earned.

A person honored by everyone in the world, but if he has not respected, he has not lived.

What does it mean?

It only means that what we gain is nothing, it is what we give that counts.

It is nothing -- what has been done to us -- if only we did all we wished to do, that is what counts.

Either learning or wisdom, position or power or wealth, all these things gained are very small compared with what one can give to the others.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

The Gift Of The Magi


The Gift Of The Magi

by O. Henry

One dollar and eighty-seven cents. That was all. And sixty cents of it was in pennies. Pennies saved one and two at a time by bulldozing the grocer and the vegetable man and the butcher until one's cheeks burned with the silent imputation of parsimony that such close dealing implied. Three times Della counted it. One dollar and eighty- seven cents. And the next day would be Christmas.

There was clearly nothing to do but flop down on the shabby little couch and howl. So Della did it. Which instigates the moral reflection that life is made up of sobs, sniffles, and smiles, with sniffles predominating.

While the mistress of the home is gradually subsiding from the first stage to the second, take a look at the home. A furnished flat at $8 per week. It did not exactly beggar description, but it certainly had that word on the lookout for the mendicancy squad.

In the vestibule below was a letter-box into which no letter would go, and an electric button from which no mortal finger could coax a ring. Also appertaining thereunto was a card bearing the name "Mr. James Dillingham Young."

The "Dillingham" had been flung to the breeze during a former period of prosperity when its possessor was being paid $30 per week. Now, when the income was shrunk to $20, though, they were thinking seriously of contracting to a modest and unassuming D. But whenever Mr. James Dillingham Young came home and reached his flat above he was called "Jim" and greatly hugged by Mrs. James Dillingham Young, already introduced to you as Della. Which is all very good.

Della finished her cry and attended to her cheeks with the powder rag. She stood by the window and looked out dully at a gray cat walking a gray fence in a gray backyard. Tomorrow would be Christmas Day, and she had only $1.87 with which to buy Jim a present. She had been saving every penny she could for months, with this result. Twenty dollars a week doesn't go far. Expenses had been greater than she had calculated. They always are. Only $1.87 to buy a present for Jim. Her Jim. Many a happy hour she had spent planning for something nice for him. Something fine and rare and sterling--something just a little bit near to being worthy of the honor of being owned by Jim.

There was a pier-glass between the windows of the room. Perhaps you have seen a pier-glass in an $8 flat. A very thin and very agile person may, by observing his reflection in a rapid sequence of longitudinal strips, obtain a fairly accurate conception of his looks. Della, being slender, had mastered the art.

Suddenly she whirled from the window and stood before the glass. her eyes were shining brilliantly, but her face had lost its color within twenty seconds. Rapidly she pulled down her hair and let it fall to its full length.

Now, there were two possessions of the James Dillingham Youngs in which they both took a mighty pride. One was Jim's gold watch that had been his father's and his grandfather's. The other was Della's hair. Had the queen of Sheba lived in the flat across the airshaft, Della would have let her hair hang out the window some day to dry just to depreciate Her Majesty's jewels and gifts. Had King Solomon been the janitor, with all his treasures piled up in the basement, Jim would have pulled out his watch every time he passed, just to see him pluck at his beard from envy.

So now Della's beautiful hair fell about her rippling and shining like a cascade of brown waters. It reached below her knee and made itself almost a garment for her. And then she did it up again nervously and quickly. Once she faltered for a minute and stood still while a tear or two splashed on the worn red carpet.

On went her old brown jacket; on went her old brown hat. With a whirl of skirts and with the brilliant sparkle still in her eyes, she fluttered out the door and down the stairs to the street.

Where she stopped the sign read: "Mne. Sofronie. Hair Goods of All Kinds." One flight up Della ran, and collected herself, panting. Madame, large, too white, chilly, hardly looked the "Sofronie."

"Will you buy my hair?" asked Della.

"I buy hair," said Madame. "Take yer hat off and let's have a sight at the looks of it."

Down rippled the brown cascade.

"Twenty dollars," said Madame, lifting the mass with a practised hand.

"Give it to me quick," said Della.

Oh, and the next two hours tripped by on rosy wings. Forget the hashed metaphor. She was ransacking the stores for Jim's present.

She found it at last. It surely had been made for Jim and no one else. There was no other like it in any of the stores, and she had turned all of them inside out. It was a platinum fob chain simple and chaste in design, properly proclaiming its value by substance alone and not by meretricious ornamentation--as all good things should do. It was even worthy of The Watch. As soon as she saw it she knew that it must be Jim's. It was like him. Quietness and value--the description applied to both. Twenty-one dollars they took from her for it, and she hurried home with the 87 cents. With that chain on his watch Jim might be properly anxious about the time in any company. Grand as the watch was, he sometimes looked at it on the sly on account of the old leather strap that he used in place of a chain.

When Della reached home her intoxication gave way a little to prudence and reason. She got out her curling irons and lighted the gas and went to work repairing the ravages made by generosity added to love. Which is always a tremendous task, dear friends--a mammoth task.

Within forty minutes her head was covered with tiny, close-lying curls that made her look wonderfully like a truant schoolboy. She looked at her reflection in the mirror long, carefully, and critically.

"If Jim doesn't kill me," she said to herself, "before he takes a second look at me, he'll say I look like a Coney Island chorus girl. But what could I do--oh! what could I do with a dollar and eighty- seven cents?"

At 7 o'clock the coffee was made and the frying-pan was on the back of the stove hot and ready to cook the chops.

Jim was never late. Della doubled the fob chain in her hand and sat on the corner of the table near the door that he always entered. Then she heard his step on the stair away down on the first flight, and she turned white for just a moment. She had a habit for saying little silent prayer about the simplest everyday things, and now she whispered: "Please God, make him think I am still pretty."

The door opened and Jim stepped in and closed it. He looked thin and very serious. Poor fellow, he was only twenty-two--and to be burdened with a family! He needed a new overcoat and he was without gloves.

Jim stopped inside the door, as immovable as a setter at the scent of quail. His eyes were fixed upon Della, and there was an expression in them that she could not read, and it terrified her. It was not anger, nor surprise, nor disapproval, nor horror, nor any of the sentiments that she had been prepared for. He simply stared at her fixedly with that peculiar expression on his face.

Della wriggled off the table and went for him.

"Jim, darling," she cried, "don't look at me that way. I had my hair cut off and sold because I couldn't have lived through Christmas without giving you a present. It'll grow out again--you won't mind, will you? I just had to do it. My hair grows awfully fast. Say `Merry Christmas!' Jim, and let's be happy. You don't know what a nice-- what a beautiful, nice gift I've got for you."

"You've cut off your hair?" asked Jim, laboriously, as if he had not arrived at that patent fact yet even after the hardest mental labor.

"Cut it off and sold it," said Della. "Don't you like me just as well, anyhow? I'm me without my hair, ain't I?"

Jim looked about the room curiously.

"You say your hair is gone?" he said, with an air almost of idiocy.

"You needn't look for it," said Della. "It's sold, I tell you--sold and gone, too. It's Christmas Eve, boy. Be good to me, for it went for you. Maybe the hairs of my head were numbered," she went on with sudden serious sweetness, "but nobody could ever count my love for you. Shall I put the chops on, Jim?"

Out of his trance Jim seemed quickly to wake. He enfolded his Della. For ten seconds let us regard with discreet scrutiny some inconsequential object in the other direction. Eight dollars a week or a million a year--what is the difference? A mathematician or a wit would give you the wrong answer. The magi brought valuable gifts, but that was not among them. This dark assertion will be illuminated later on.

Jim drew a package from his overcoat pocket and threw it upon the table.

"Don't make any mistake, Dell," he said, "about me. I don't think there's anything in the way of a haircut or a shave or a shampoo that could make me like my girl any less. But if you'll unwrap that package you may see why you had me going a while at first."

White fingers and nimble tore at the string and paper. And then an ecstatic scream of joy; and then, alas! a quick feminine change to hysterical tears and wails, necessitating the immediate employment of all the comforting powers of the lord of the flat.

For there lay The Combs--the set of combs, side and back, that Della had worshipped long in a Broadway window. Beautiful combs, pure tortoise shell, with jewelled rims--just the shade to wear in the beautiful vanished hair. They were expensive combs, she knew, and her heart had simply craved and yearned over them without the least hope of possession. And now, they were hers, but the tresses that should have adorned the coveted adornments were gone.

But she hugged them to her bosom, and at length she was able to look up with dim eyes and a smile and say: "My hair grows so fast, Jim!"

And them Della leaped up like a little singed cat and cried, "Oh, oh!"

Jim had not yet seen his beautiful present. She held it out to him eagerly upon her open palm. The dull precious metal seemed to flash with a reflection of her bright and ardent spirit.

"Isn't it a dandy, Jim? I hunted all over town to find it. You'll have to look at the time a hundred times a day now. Give me your watch. I want to see how it looks on it."

Instead of obeying, Jim tumbled down on the couch and put his hands under the back of his head and smiled.

"Dell," said he, "let's put our Christmas presents away and keep 'em a while. They're too nice to use just at present. I sold the watch to get the money to buy your combs. And now suppose you put the chops on."

The magi, as you know, were wise men--wonderfully wise men--who brought gifts to the Babe in the manger. They invented the art of giving Christmas presents. Being wise, their gifts were no doubt wise ones, possibly bearing the privilege of exchange in case of duplication. And here I have lamely related to you the uneventful chronicle of two foolish children in a flat who most unwisely sacrificed for each other the greatest treasures of their house. But in a last word to the wise of these days let it be said that of all who give gifts these two were the wisest. O all who give and receive gifts, such as they are wisest. Everywhere they are wisest. They are the magi.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Opening Our Mind

Giving frees us from
the familiar territory of our own needs
by opening our mind to the unexplained
worlds occupied by the needs of others.
Barbara Bush

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

The Last, The Lost, The Least

What if all be failure—I have no fear—if only one family—if only one little unhappy child is made happy with the love of Jesus, tell me will it not be worth all of us giving all for that? —Mother Teresa

Just as in the parable of the Good Shepherd, God seeks always the last, the lost, the least.
Who in your life needs finding and bringing back to the fold?

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Elder's Meditation -- A Giving Person

The Great Spirit created a system of balance and justice.
This law says, if you treat others with respect,
you will be treated with respect.
If you gossip about no one,
no one will gossip about you.
If you are fair in all of your dealings,
you can expect the same.
If you share with others,
others, will share with you.
If you judge others,
others will judge you.
You will always get back what you give out.
The original teaching talks about being a giving person.
A giving person will constantly be on the receiving end.

My Creator, help me to be a giving person today.

Thursday, August 30, 2007

Giving the Gift

God’s posture toward us is always a giving posture;
it never changes.
We may accept or refuse what he offers,
but that doesn’t change God’s desire to bestow on us his Son.

from The Journey Within: Prayer as a Path to God

Monday, August 27, 2007

Elder's Meditation -- The Feeling Of Giving

There are certain prayers or actions we can take that will call the Powers.
The powers can only work through people.
The Powers are always waiting to express themselves through people that are ready.
Every person born is born with a purpose.
They have a song to sing.
They have a mission to accomplish.
Every true purpose will always be about serving the Creator and helping others.
When we let the Powers know that we are ready to serve the people, the Powers get excited because they can now do things to help the people and make things better for them.
The decision is powerful because it turns an idea into action.

Great Spirit, the greatest joy or feeling that I have ever experienced
is when you are using me to help the people,
the feeling of giving, the feeling of being your channel.
Today, let me have that feeling of giving.
Use me as You will.

Sunday, August 19, 2007

The Gifts To Give

Because we have been forgiven, we know the way of forgiveness;
because we have been healed, we know the way of healing;
because we have know God, we know the way of God.
The gifts given to me are the gifts for me to give.

Friday, July 27, 2007

My Own Faltering Steps

The love, the acceptance of other persons makes me
into the unique person I am meant to be.
--Peter G. van Breemen, S.J.


The letter, the smile, or phone call I offer a fellow traveler today will bless my own faltering steps throughout the long hours ahead.
Each time I focus my attention on the struggle or joy of someone else, my personal well being is enhanced.
If I give away my love, I'll doubt less that I, too, am loved.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

A Time to Receive and a Time to Give

It is important to know when we can give attention and when we need attention.
Often we are inclined to give, give, and give without ever asking anything in return.
We may think that this is a sign of generosity or even heroism.
But it might be little else than a proud attitude that says: "I don't need help from others. I only want to give."
When we keep giving without receiving we burn out quickly.
Only when we pay careful attention to our own physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual needs can we be, and remain, joyful givers.
There is a time to give and a time to receive.
We need equal time for both if we want to live healthy lives.

-- Henri Nouwen

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Giving

You never need anything when you give
away that which you thought you lacked . . .
you suddenly experience that
you had it to give all along.
-- Neale Donald Walsch, Tomorrow's God

Monday, June 4, 2007

Love And Living

"The progress of the person and the progress of society go together. Our modern world cannot attain to peace, and to a fully equitable social order, merely by the application of laws which act upon humanity, so to speak, from outside ourselves. The transformation of society begins within the person. It begins with the maturing and opening out of personal freedom in relation to other freedoms - in relation to the rest of society. The Christian "giving" that is required of us is a full and intelligent participation in the life of our world, not only on a basis of natural law, but also in the communion and reconciliation of interpersonal love. This means a capacity to be open to others as persons, to desire for others all that we know to be needful for ourselves, all this is required for the full growth and even temporal happiness of a fully personal existence."

--Thomas Merton, Love and Living

"How does Man attain to a real union of love with his neighbor? Not merely by abstract agreement about truths concerning the end of all things and the afterlife, but by a realistic collaboration in the work of daily living in the world of hard facts in which everyone must work in order to eat."

--Thomas Merton, Love and Living