Self-will Run Riot

So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making.
They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn't think so.
Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness.
We must, or it kills us! God makes that possible.
-- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 62

Merry-go-round

I began to feel like a clown juggling too many balls.

Each ball represented a problem I was keeping up in the air.

My arms were weary and I knew I couldn't keep on much longer,but I was not about to give up.

My pride and ego wouldn't let me.

Bosses, judges, co-workers, lawyers, car notes, bar tabs, loan sharks, utility payments, landlords, my girlfriend, people I had double-crossed -- I looked to all these as the source of my problems, while overlooking the most basic problem:
my drinking and myself.

I'd known for a long time that I desperately wanted off this merry-go-round,
but I had no idea how to do it.
-- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 506



Swallowing my pride will not get me drunk.